How Smart Leaders Resolve Conflict
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Several years ago, I sat across the table from two directors* as the mediator in a dispute worth a little over $100K. The dispute had been going on for two years. Early on, the directors, fixed in their positions, tried to address it over the phone, by trying to convince the other that the other was wrong. After a few of these calls the discussions became heated. Then they moved to email and became keyboard warriors. Silence ensued after a few months, as they had to focus on their business until finally, they brought in the lawyers.
For those two years it seemed no one was ready for a mediator – a professional dedicated to supporting parties to uncover the underlying issues and helping the parties work through those issues toward a resolution.
Our two directors endured two years of personal stress, opportunity costs, lost business time, lost income and mounting legal fees as the parties tried to litigate the dispute out of court. Costs for both parties were already well above the disputed amount. Each was determined they were right – it was a matter of principle!
It took four months and several rescheduled dates to finally agree on a mediation date. Even then, I didn’t expect the mediation to proceed, but the date arrived and both directors and their support teams turned up. The mediation commenced and, on several occasions, I thought one or both parties would walk out.
Instead, almost seven hours later and after much discussion and debate, both directors signed a deed of settlement – we had finally resolved the two-year long dispute!
For me, it brought two things into focus:
Despite how the mediation appeared to progress, no one – including the mediator – can predict the outcome. This is why process is so important. A strong mediation process, in which both parties feel empowered, creates conditions to support a resolution
Ultimately, both parties shared a common need – resolution of the dispute in order to stop haemorrhaging cash and to move on and get back to their businesses.
So, what’s the takeaway? Don’t let conflict impact your business or workplace through lost productivity and costs. One of the reasons I launched ResolutionWise was to support businesses, workplaces and individuals to resolve disputes quickly, commercially and confidentially. Having facilitated over 2,000 mediations and conciliations, I have encountered many disputes similar to this one.
I strongly hold the view that conflict met with silence or aggressive confrontation by parties is a reflexive way of avoiding having difficult yet necessary and meaningful conversations. This is where a mediator can serve an important role.
Mediators are different in their personality, approach, and mediation style. This means that for every business dealing with conflict, there is a Right Mediator for your dispute. I teamed up with Steve Lancken and Ben Lee and together we launched Right Mediator to help individuals, workplaces and businesses find the right support.
Smart leaders resolve conflict early – they do not let it run for years, incurring stress, costs and lost opportunities before taking the step to mediation.
*Disclaimer: Names of individuals, companies, and industry sectors have been omitted to protect confidentiality and ensure client anonymity.
Lynette Edwards authored this article as part of Right Mediator’s professional practice series. You can find out more about Lynette’s mediation and conflict management coaching business at www.resolutionwise.com.au
Originally published on LinkedIn.